When I was in college and a few weeks into my first relationship, my friends who were keen on teaching me “how to be in a relationship”, kept telling me that I had to guard my partner from other women. This led me to feel jealous whenever I saw him hanging out with his female friends or classmates, although at times, I didn’t experience any such emotions. Which was weird, I guess?
Fast forward to my relationship with Neithan… Early on, I would feel the same hints of jealousy, but eventually, I found that I didn’t feel jealous at all. In fact, it didn’t bother me to see Neithan talking or interacting with other women.
As I matured, I discovered that society’s expectations for women to feel jealous when their partners are around other women had influenced me to adopt this behavior. But I realized this might not accurately represent my own feelings. I do not have to feel what other people are suggesting I should feel. I often tell Neithan this has become my superpower and how this has eliminated a potential source of conflict between us.
There is so much to learn about the world and ourselves outside of the default stories we are being told. Stories can determine what will happen.
Question everything. You might just unlock a superpower.
Here’s a photo of us that set the universe astir back in 2013. 😅